What a weekend...

For the longest time I have had a crush on great aspiration for this older guy, for the person I assumed he was and the things he had. He was tall, fit (gorgeous), nice, is great with his daughter and I really respected the jobs he and his wife hold while still being married, parents and seeming happy. I’ve had this idolized view of him since I was a little girl too. So, imagine my disappointment when I see him out with someone who is not his wife. He’s making out with this woman, they were all over each other and left together. Oh, and I noticed all this after I had said hello to him (so he knew I was there) and after I had just told my friends what a great guy he was. I was shocked and totally heartbroken. Maybe “crush” does apply here because I was absolutely crushed as I saw all this go on and I’ve been pretty bummed out ever since. I mean, this is a guy I really thought was the perfect example of a good guy … and then I see that. Uh!

Here’s another fun-filled story for you and, lucky me, this was all the same weekend! This guy walked into the bar several weeks ago and, oh my god, he is so gorgeous! So, for weeks now I’ve been going out and maybe sort of hoping to see him again. Well, last night he was finally there and I made a complete fool out of myself when I finally did approach him. I clamed up and got pretty quiet because he was barely talking. I’m not sure how drunk he was then, but either way I felt pretty stupid.

I’m painfully, painfully shy when it comes to that sort of thing, so I guess I shouldn’t have expected much more out of myself. And what kind of girl approaches a guy with not much more in mind to say than “Um, you are gorgeous!” Ha! Actually the situation reminds me of this line from my favorite book: “She couldn’t speak to him. She wanted to, but was afraid when she opened her mouth that all her words would meld into a primitive moan.” I hate guys that make you feel like that – you’ve got no show when you can’t even form words :) I formed them, I just wasn’t very creative with holding a one sided conversation with, I’m guessing, a very drunk guy.

Whatever. I approached him, introduced myself and tried to start a conversation. That’s all good – all good things on my part. I mean, it’s not like he was going to fall head over feet for me after I approached him (sadly ::sigh:: hehehe). Not to mention, honestly, I would have kicked myself if I had passed up the chance at saying hello and never seen him again, so I guess I deserve some credit since I took advantage of the situation and introduced myself, plus his friend was super hot too and introduced himself to me after I approached them (oh yea, because I didn’t just approach the guy I’ve practically been drooling over, no I approached him and all his friends. Ah! Did I seriously expect that situation to go well???)

I could really go for some gummy bears right now…